Look Ahead

Still in retail and it had been just over a year. I was doing the same job was it was becoming mundane; I felt that I was no longer learning anything new neither was I enjoying it. In fact, I was starting to hate my job and I was desperate to get out. I wanted a job in the field I wish to pursue but trying to get experience was difficult. I saw a post to become an Assistant Support Worker and I applied! The application took me 4 hours and even though I knew that it could be a waste of my time if I didn’t get the job or even shortlisted, I had to take this opportunity. Thankfully, I was shortlisted! My time was not wasted. I went into the interview prepared. There was meant to be 5 people at the interview but 2 candidates didn’t arrive and one was late so I was more relaxed. My chances had just gone up!

The interview was a two-part interview - one, with a panel interview where we were watched and were asked to discuss who we were to take on a spaceship with us. I guess it was to see teamwork and also see how we made decisions. The second part was similar to speed dating where we would jump from one station to the next with an interviewer asking questions. I thought I did relatively well and did have a good feeling. I wasn’t nervous as much and did enjoy the process. We were told after a while that we would be told how we did on the same day or latest the next day. When I got home, I received a call. It was the call I was hoping for! I had got the job!

Monday 19th November 2012 was my first day, it was great, I finally had to use my mind and I found myself learning so much and so quickly. After, about 6 months, I was comfortably into my role and I had decided that I did not want to do any more sleep in’s and was ready to move on to the next step – to become a support worker. I had planned to definitely achieve this before the end of the year. I didn’t want to be an ASW for longer than a year. An opportunity came up and I didn’t hesitate and applied. My line manager was supportive and felt that I was ready to move and encouraged me to.

Again, I loved the interviewing process and was confident. I wasn’t sure if I had got the role as I was told that there was quite a good standard and the earlier candidates that took the interview were pretty good too. But thankfully, I managed to get the job!

I started my role as support worker on Monday 30^th September 2013. I was so happy! It was tough at times; the clients were more demanding that I initially anticipated. There was a lot of lone working and a lot of the responsibility was down to you. There were times of stress but also times were I loved what I was doing. As time went on, the demands of the work started to grind on me. I was slowly losing all my passion. I could feel myself deteriorating. My mood, my attitude and my passion weren’t there. I tired to find the love I had for the work but by 6 months, I wasn’t feeling the same. I knew it was time to start thinking about the end goal. I started to feel like I was more bitter and had less patience that I started with, I didn’t like what I was becoming. I made myself a promise that I would never become unemployed if I didn’t have another job lined up so I wasn’t willing to resign. After some serious contemplation, I looked at what I enjoyed about my work and what aspects I didn’t and I came to the conclusion that I would want to become a Counselling Psychologist. So, I looked at the steps into this and I decided to apply for Counselling Psychology. I didn’t have any expectation as I knew I was appyign quite late into the year so I thought I could use this time as experience and see what the process entailed. I thought I would do another year of support work and maybe try to get more experience within counseling. However, to my surprise, I was shortlisted for an interview at Roehampton University.

My boyfriend was very supportive and had helped me prepare and supported me all the way. On Thursday 8^th May 2014, I went for my interview. It was a strange interview. The group interview I am sure I didn’t perform too well but I put myself out there as the interview did mention it was something we had to do if we was accepted on the course – we were expected to be uncomfortable in situations. The 1:1 interview was much better I felt. My interviewer was so relaxed and had a friendly presence about her. This made me feel at ease and I managed to talk to her in a conversational manner and I really enjoyed that part. I wasn’t sure if I had got it or not, but I didn’t think I did as at the beginning we was told that there were only 20 spaces and that 50-70 candidates were being interviewed. I didn’t count on it. They said a future 20 would be on a waiting list but not to rely on that as the chances were slim that people would drop out for those on the waiting list.

When I came out of the interview, I wasn’t sure how to feel. A part of me, felt that I should have did a bit better and thought I should have given more effort as it was a great opportunity and another part thought maybe it wasn’t meant to be (it was far!). I decided that I will just see what happens will happen.

At the end of May, I received the news that I was on a waiting list. I was partly happy and partly disappointed as well. Disappointed because I still had to go to work and not enjoy it for another year, but happy because I didn’t need to travel so far and had no fee’s to pay. I didn’t hold on to the possibility that I would get a place on the course as I felt it was unlikely that I was anywhere near the top of the list.

On Tuesday 29^th July, I did not have a good day at work. In fact, it was probably one of the most stressful days I wished I were not working. It was a bad day. When I got home, the news I never thought I would get, I got. I checked my emails and it told me that I had an unconditional offer for Roehampton. My mood changed from down to shooting sky high. I couldn’t believe it and was in genuine shock. I had to ask my sisters to double check that I wasn’t reading it incorrectly. I accepted the offer and I was ready to embark on the next chapter of my career. I was excited also nervous! Let the chapter begin! Hard work, I am ready for you.